Shyness is such a debilitating condition that can affect a person’s every day existence. It can adversely affect a sufferer socially, at work, romantically, and in any situation dealing with people. For anyone that has had to deal with this condition, to be able to stop shyness for good is their top priority.
But programming and conditioning of a person’s emotional state, often from a very young age, runs very deep in one’s subconscious so it can be very hard to stop shyness without a lot of effort. Self esteem is generally very low for someone that suffers from shyness.
I am an introvert by nature, even to this day, but I was very, very shy as a child. I can’t blame my parents, but I grew up believing that kids are there to be seen and not heard, and that it’s bad to show off and have fun. Luckily, through personal development and working on myself, I am a lot more confident and at ease around people in social situations. I’m still not really outgoing (especially around strangers) but I do FEEL much more comfortable than I used to be.
I’m pretty sure that this is the same for most shy people, but what caused me to be “stuck” in shyness for so long, was being so self-conscious and afraid of making mistakes and looking foolish in front of other people. It was only when I started to “notice” other people had faults, and would often make a fool of themselves, and yet people around them didn’t seem to care. I think the key was, that these people had confidence in themselves no matter what, and they believed in themselves… and they didn’t care what other people thought of them.
Believe in Yourself
That is the next point that I want to make… don’t care so much what other people think about you. Live your life to the fullest, and have confidence in yourself. Believe in yourself and other people will respect you for it. With that respect, your improving self confidence will grow even more, and your self esteem will sky-rocket.
Start Off Small
Accept the fact that you will not change overnight and suddenly be an extremely outgoing person. This process will take time, so start small initially by socializing in small groups of just 2 or 3. You will find that you are far more comfortable with only a couple of people and you can open up a lot more than you could in a large group setting.
Work On The Way You Look
If you are going out in a social setting, make sure that you work on your look beforehand. If you can feel comfortable in the way you look, it only stands to reason that you will FEEL more confident and outgoing. This means wearing good clothes that fit you well, but it also means projecting yourself with the right posture and body language also.
Definitely don’t underestimate body language… it can be a powerful tool to helping you FEEL and LOOK more confident, thus allowing you to be more outgoing. There’s some great tips in the article, Top 10: Ways To Show Confidence With Body Language that will help get you started…
“What message do you communicate the moment you walk into a room? What are your eyes, hands and shoulders saying? What information can people gather about you before you ever say a word? Never thought about it? You should. And you can start by perusing our top 10 tips to show confidence with body language.”
Read more… Top 10: Ways To Show Confidence With Body Language.
There’s also a great article written by Nick Notas titled, The Newbie’s Guide to Looking Attractive: Body Language …
“Having confident body language completely changes the way people perceive you. You’ll command more respect and be taken more seriously. People will trust you more. Girls will find you captivating and attractive. And even if you’re nervous on the inside, you’ll look calm and collected to everyone else.” Read more at … The Newbie’s Guide to Looking Attractive: Body Language.
Although changing your inner game can affect your outer results, the opposite is also true… changing things on the outside can have the effect of improving your inner self, so working on your body language and posture can have great benefits.
Keep Working On Your Inner Self
I couldn’t have made the progress that I’ve made in my life without the help of self help products and personal development courses. It’s very important that you work on your inner self, so read as many books on the subject as you can but also participate in some online courses. If you can boost your confidence and self esteem, the shyness will just fall away all by its self.
You don’t have to put up with shyness for the rest of your life… you can and should put a stop to it, starting now. Not only are you missing out on fulfilling friendships, but other people are missing out by not getting to experience quality time with you.